Updated: Sep 30, 2020
As I jumped into this exciting new chapter in my life, I was hindered by one of the things that always creeps up on me, procrastination. I knew I had to get x,y,z done but before that, I should work on a,b,c, which had no immediate rush but probably should get done first. I found myself setting deadlines I'd postpone because I was just doing it for myself, so I approved the extension. Then when I finally did start, I would re-read, edit, and start over. It seemed like everything I did, I could find mistakes or it just wasn't right. I had little bouts of 'It's done, put it out to the world' but then I went back to old habits. I hated the fact I wasn't, no, couldn't finish these tasks, it made me stressed and at times depressed. Even when starting projects I was already looking at every negative and not celebrating any of the positives. Once some doubt changes your mindset it's hard to circle back to being positive and motivated.
Being a real estate agent is a HARD job. I already knew that working for Garland and watching her. But I came in blind, thinking I could see. I had the knowledge and continued to gain more but I did not feel comfortable with the execution. I would listen to trainings and coaches and although what they did obviously worked for them, I didn't want to mimic these successful people because it didn't seem as if I was being authentic using there plans. When I tried it seemed forced and because of that I began doubting being myself. I started spending my work hours just reading about real estate in the area and watching coaching videos and feeling like something needed to click, soon. I was slowly losing positive motivation and faith that I was going to be successful. I came in with the mindset I wasn't going to fail, but now a voice in my head would question, am I going to fail? I felt like I knew what I should do, but I didn't see myself being happy doing it. I wanted to become an agent to help people not bug them but felt like if I didn't bug them I would never get a sale. So I started procrastinating and questioning my decision and every decision I was making now that I had went all in. I re-wrote my Buyer's Packet FIVE TIMES! Five times of literally deleting everything and starting over. I was struggling because I had ideas, but when I searched to see if I could find something similar to mirror I couldn't.
The one thing that takes my mind off of that doubt and my own negative thoughts is my #fancyfriday posts, which I had started on the third week of our first COVID lockdown after having a rough 2 weeks. A day to get all fancy and wear a dress and do my make-up, if you know me well, I am usually not one to dress up (although I own a staggering amount of dresses for some reason). It was a change of pace and made me smile but even that was having a shadow cast on it. After a talking with a friend who's work does #tiedyefridays, I had challenged myself that I could fancy up tie-dye. I chose a bride's maid's dress that I had already worn for fancy Friday and got to work. I had no idea what I was working with fabric wise, but I twisted and rubber banded the dress, dyed it and let sit extra long knowing I would lose some color on the wash out. I was so excited when I untied it, it was gorgeous and bright. I let it completely dry hoping again to get the color set. I didn't even think to take a photo before I tossed it under water and rinsed it out, I was sure it was perfect. The water washed away almost everything! The yellow dress did not look tie dyed at all, it just looked teal/seafoam green. COMPLETE FAILURE. Nothing was going my way, I pretended like it wasn't horrible but inside my head I knew it was not acceptable, I failed.
Although I wanted to give up, I didn't. Just like with real estate, I had went all in and it was going to workout in the end! My search for dyeing synthetic fabric did not give me any solid answers and my options did not look promising. I found nothing on the internet that would help me get the results that I wanted. I could use synthetic dye, but the entire dress needs to be dyed at once and I wanted multiple colors. I hit a wall, apparently nobody was tie-dyeing bridesmaids dresses! In fact if you google 'can you tie-dye a bride's maids dress?' the answer is NO! But I had an idea. I searched again with my plan, but much like my Real Estate idea's I didn't find anything to help do what I thought would work for me. Difference was it was art and unlike Real Estate I am not afraid to try something just because I can't find it validated somewhere. I went all in and crossed my fingers it would work how I hoped! I won't bore you with the details but dead Sharpies were involved! I am going to write a blog on just the process of how I did all of it because it came out amazing! I did it, I had #fancytiedye SUCCESS!!
This small victory may just seem like I accomplished dying a dress but it was more than just a tie-dye success, it was a personal motivation boost. I had decided to go full time as an agent and I started to have my doubts, but I had them without even trying to do it my way. I was comparing myself and ideas to people who already found their success and because I wasn't comfortable I was getting in my own way. I was scared to try something different and just be me. Shortly after I did my victory dance, I also found a podcast that made everything click. A real estate podcast that promotes being your authentic self and success will be a by product. I fell in love and realized Real Estate Agent's have the best job! I have the best job! A job that can make you a better version of yourself and allow you to always be learning and helping people. I have the time now to gain so much knowledge about my industry as well as work on making sure that I hold myself to the the standard I want to promote as an agent. To be knowledgeable, consistent and someone you can count on! I'm starting this week with a new outlook and a new plan, be true to myself! I'm excited and can't wait to see what the future will hold!
Follow me on Facebook or Instagram to see future fancy Friday's or to show me your fancy Friday's! And even when you think things aren't going right, keep at it and keep trying success will come!